Social Surveillance: Monitoring Others’ Lives Through Their Online Activity

By Dr. Manju Rani, Psychologist

In today’s digitally mediated world, observing others no longer requires physical proximity. A few taps on a screen allow us to track where people go, what they eat, whom they meet, and how they feel—at least as portrayed online. This phenomenon, widely referred to as social surveillance, has become an embedded feature of everyday psychological life. While often dismissed as casual curiosity or harmless scrolling, social surveillance carries deeper psychological meanings and consequences that merit careful reflection.

As a psychologist, I view social surveillance not simply as a technological habit, but as a behavioral pattern rooted in core human motives—belongingness, self-evaluation, attachment, and control—now amplified by digital platforms.

What Is Social Surveillance?

Social surveillance refers to the ongoing monitoring of others’ lives through their online activity, including social media posts, stories, likes, comments, online status indicators, and digital absences. Unlike traditional surveillance, it is largely voluntary, mutual, and normalized within social culture.

Importantly, social surveillance often occurs without direct interaction. One may remain emotionally invested in another person’s life while never communicating with them, creating a one-sided psychological presence that can significantly influence thoughts, emotions, and self-perception.

The Psychological Roots of Social Surveillance

1. Social Comparison and Identity Formation

Human beings naturally evaluate themselves in relation to others. Social media environments intensify this tendency by presenting highly curated versions of reality. When individuals repeatedly compare their behind-the-scenes life with others’ highlight reels, it can distort self-appraisal and contribute to feelings of inadequacy, envy, or failure.

For adolescents and young adults, whose identities are still forming, social surveillance can become a primary lens through which self-worth is judged.

2. Need for Belonging and Emotional Reassurance

Monitoring others online often serves as a substitute for connection. For individuals experiencing loneliness, relational insecurity, or anxious attachment, social surveillance offers a sense of proximity without vulnerability. The person feels “connected” while avoiding the emotional risks of direct engagement.

However, this form of connection is psychologically fragile and often unfulfilling.

3. Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

Social surveillance is closely linked with FOMO—the persistent concern that others are enjoying rewarding experiences without us. Checking behaviors temporarily soothe this anxiety but ultimately reinforce it, creating a compulsive loop of monitoring and emotional comparison.

4. Illusion of Control in Relationships

In certain interpersonal contexts, particularly romantic or strained relationships, social surveillance provides an illusion of control and predictability. Knowing when someone was last online or who interacted with their content may momentarily reduce uncertainty, but it often increases emotional dependency and mistrust over time.

Platform Design and Behavioral Conditioning

Social media platforms are designed to encourage observation. Features such as:

• Story view counts
• Online/last active indicators
• Algorithmic resurfacing of past connections
• Notifications prompting “check-ins”

operate on principles of behavioral reinforcement. Intermittent access to information about others’ lives functions much like a variable reward system, strengthening habitual checking and monitoring behaviors.

From a psychological standpoint, this design subtly shifts users from active participants to passive observers.

Psychological Consequences of Chronic Social Surveillance

Heightened Anxiety and Rumination

Ambiguous online cues often lead to overinterpretation. Individuals may repeatedly analyze posts, likes, or silence, generating anxiety-driven narratives that lack factual grounding.

Decline in Self-Esteem

Continuous exposure to idealized portrayals of success, beauty, relationships, and productivity can erode self-esteem and promote unrealistic life expectations.

Relationship Strain

Social surveillance may replace healthy communication. Assumptions are formed based on online behavior rather than dialogue, leading to misunderstandings, jealousy, and emotional distancing.

Boundary Confusion

When others’ lives are constantly accessible, psychological boundaries weaken. Detachment becomes difficult, and emotional energy is invested in relationships that may no longer exist in real terms.

When Does Social Surveillance Become Unhealthy?

Social surveillance becomes clinically relevant when:

• It is compulsive or time-consuming
• Mood fluctuates based on others’ online activity
• One’s self-worth depends heavily on comparison
• Offline functioning, concentration, or sleep is affected

At this point, the behavior shifts from social curiosity to psychological vulnerability.

Therapeutic Reflections and Mental Health Implications

In clinical and academic contexts, social surveillance frequently emerges in association with:

• Anxiety and depressive symptoms
• Low self-esteem
• Relationship insecurity
• Identity confusion in digital-native populations

Psychological interventions often focus on:

• Awareness of comparison-driven thoughts
• Cognitive restructuring
• Digital boundary setting
• Encouraging direct communication
• Strengthening offline identity and purpose

Mental health in the digital era requires not only emotional regulation, but also attentional regulation.

Cultivating Digital Psychological Hygiene

Healthy digital engagement does not require complete disengagement, but intentional use. Reflective questions such as:

• What am I seeking by checking this person’s profile?
• How does this behavior affect my emotional state?
• Am I observing instead of living my own experience?

can restore agency and self-awareness.

Conclusion

Social surveillance is a defining psychological behavior of contemporary life—quietly shaping how individuals see themselves, relate to others, and experience reality. While technology has expanded our access to information about others, it has simultaneously challenged our capacity for presence, authenticity, and self-compassion.

From a psychological perspective, the goal is not to eliminate social surveillance, but to engage consciously, maintain emotional boundaries, and anchor identity beyond the digital gaze. In doing so, individuals can protect their mental well-being while navigating an increasingly